My family left the UK for Africa when I was 4 years old: first stop Kenya, then South Africa. Then, I was a precocious and moody 11-year-old with two major chips on my shoulder: my smiley older brother, who everyone knew was the favourite, and the yet-to-be born baby who was apparently the prize for Daddy winning the Royal Nairobi Golf Tournament.

Every night I prayed for a little sister, while my brother put in his bid for a boy. Sadly, it seems that one brother to blight my life wasn’t enough, and another one bounced bonnily into my life on 18th April – and THAT’S when it hit me – I was adopted!

It was just so obvious: Mum’s birthday was 18th May, Dad’s was 18th November, and big brother’s 18th December – my parents even got married on 18th March! The key was the number 18: my own birthday was 4th May. Classic adoption giveaway.

Then, Mum, Dad and their male progeny had dark hair and eyes; I was blonde and blue-eyed. I wore glasses, and my orthodontal bills were as big as my massive milk teeth; they flaunted their 20/20 vision and perfect teeth (though to be fair, the baby had a squint and no teeth at that point). I had flat feet, the others had arches like viaducts; they were all quite tall, even the baby was apparently ‘long’ – and I was a ‘wee shortie’. They smiled and laughed a lot; I sulked and simmered constantly. The clues were everywhere.

I kept my knowledge secret for almost a year, until Dad’s parents came to stay; small of stature, bespectacled, mouths full of NHS dentures, and laden with fading photos of my dad – as a fair-haired baby and mousy kid. My ‘Eureka moment’ hit me: while I have inherited none of my mother’s long-legged brunette beauty, I was without doubt my father’s child, in appearance and temperament. I was one of them, I belonged, I was loved – best of all, I was the only daughter, with a unique birthday number!

America’s 4th amendment states that people have the right to be secure in their persons, and in their homes; my 4th amendment is the right to know I belong to my family. This knowledge hugs me close and keeps me strong even as I write this today, on 4th May – my birthday!