One of my biggest influences was my step-grandmother, Violet Thunander, known as Vi to my mother, but as Gommie to us, as kids.Gommie lived in a high rise, just off Michigan Avenue in Chicago. Gommie was a successful real estate agent, and part of her success had to be attributed to her sass, verve, fashion style and enthusiasm.She looked city chic at 75 in her leopard print miniskirt, dark chocolate ribbed turtleneck, milk chocolate suede vest, tortoise shell glasses Jackie O oval glasses, and strawberry blonde short curly pixie cut.She sold apartments in the building, and across the city.Gommie always hosted us for Thanksgiving, up high in her vertigo-inducing condo, dizzying at least for a young boy when he’d lean his forehead on the window and look directly down at the people ants and model toy cars, far below.Her apartment had a galley kitchen, but she’d still make enough wonderful Thanksgiving spreads, that we always took a complete plate with nice silver, down to the doorman and the garage guy, every holiday.Setting out from her place, to stroll down Michigan Avenue, was my first big city imprint. As we walked, various people would say or wave “Hi!” to my grandmother. Whether doorman, postman, society lady with dog or even some famous person or politician, I was thrilled that she knew people down the lane. This was way better than someone like Mr. Rogers did in his imaginary podunk town.I wanted Gommie’s life.One night, Gommie took me and my sisters out for culture and fun in the Windy City.Miomir’s Serbian Club it was! At the end of the meal, tables were moved, and we threw glasses or cups, yelling some version of Opaa! as people danced.Napkins dangled as a Serbian Tarantella carioca chain dance commenced.Eventually, Miomir with his lush waves of white hair and his bullish masculinity, started to hit on my grandmother.In one quick evening, at 12 years old, I realized my sweet grandmother who served us fancy Thanksgiving in her “tiny” 2 bedroom apartment in the sky, was actually also a real human being, with crushes and heartbreak. After that night, I started to see my grandmother not only as an authority figure, but also as an example of how to live on your own, successfully, happily and getting hit on by handsome men your own age.